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Rachel Rose Keller

Satire & Humor

(Selected Pieces)

McSweeney's Internet Tendency

I'm Not Afraid of Stephen King Books Because I Know Maine Isn't Real
(3rd most-read piece on McSweeney's, April 2022, featured in Patreon; check out this interview on the writing process)

Unfortunately We Can’t Hire You After Seeing That 2010 Photo Of You Drinking A Beer When You Were Sixteen
(Top trending piece on McSweeney's for 2 weeks following publication)

How Far We’ve Come in Trump’s First 100 Days

How Far We've Come Since 2016: Election Edition

How Far We've Come Since 2016

Our Meeting On Accessibility Is Just Down Those Stairs

Reductress

Tyrant? This Man Became the Mayor of Flavortown Without Ever Holding a Fair Election
(Inspired official Guy Fieri FlavorTown merchandise)

DUDE CORNER: Hypothetically, What If My Argument Was Right? (Full Piece)

Sleeping With the Fishes? This Woman Is About to Fuck a Tilapia

Man Kills Time Waiting for Cohesive Idea by Speaking

Why I’m Not Falling for My Ex’s Tricks Unless He Says ‘Ta Da!’ at the End

Woman Has Great Conversation With Parents by Revealing Nothing About Herself and Learning Nothing About Them

I LIVED IT: I Had Fun at the County Fair and Became the Star of a Prozac Commercial

Recipe Calls For Too Much Math

Woman Joins Cult on Promise of Free Tote Bag

The Belladonna

The Maid Of Honor Speech At A Fuck Marry Kill Wedding

You Will Now Be Deemed Worthy For Eternal Salvation In Heaven Based On Your Credit Score

SlackJaw

I, The Woman Quietly Reading In This Park, Am Begging To Be Part Of Your Content

The Scientific Community Desperately Needs Your Solar System Diorama

We As A Family Cannot Afford Another Wall Broken By The Kool-Aid Man

Points In Case

Please Listen Carefully as Our Menu Options Have Changed, and Also I Have This New Screenplay Idea

Welcome to the Podcast That Will Become a Book That Will Become a Podcast About the Making of the Book

Announcing the Death of Larry Smith, Beloved Dentist, Community Member, Lawn Mower Thief

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